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Monday, July 9, 2012

New Pinoy Pick Up Lines 2012 + "Call Me Maybe" Jokes

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Girl 1: (kumakain ng Nagaraya) Gusto mo?
Girl 2: Ayoko. Tinitigyawat ako sa mani eh.
Girl 1: Ay talaga? Ako kasi sa mukha lang eh.
--------------

Girl: Aso ka ba?
Boy: Bakit?
Girl: Kasi sinaktan mo ko.
Boy: Oh nasaan yung aso dun?
Girl: Aw. </3--------------

ONE-LINER NA BANAT:

"In fairness sa kagandahan mo ah... parang passcode sa iPhone. Ikaw lang ang nakakaalam."

"Miss, para kang rebond, nagawa mo kong straight!”
--------------

ARAW ka ba?
PASIKAT ka rin kasi.
Eh ang SAKIT-SAKIT mo naman sa MATA.
--------------



La Sallista ka ba?
Bakit?
Kasi pinana mo yata puso ko eh
--------------

Sana “T” na lang ako noh?
Bakit?
Para I’m always right next to “U”
--------------

Miss, taxi ka ba? 
Bakit?
Bawat minuto kasi napapamahal ako sayo eh!

------------

Sabi nila libreng mangarap..
Libre ka ba?
Pangarap kasi kita eh!!!
--------------

Boy: Puro ka lakwatsa!!!
Girl: Huh?
Boy: Pati sa puso ko nakakarating ka!
--------------

Para kang TABLE OF CONTENTS
Bakit?
Dahil ikaw ang topic ng bawat pahina ng buhay ko
--------------

(guy walks towards the girl na parang galit) 
BOY: "Miss, ok ka rin noh?! ang kapal ng mukha mo! 
GIRL: (medyo na shocked) 
BOY: "Hindi pa nga kita nakikilala pina-ibig mo na ang puso ko."
--------------

Scenario: Girl and Boy with their friends in the school canteen.
Boy: Mauna na ko. (sabay grab sa hands ng girl patayo din)
Girl: Bakit?
Boy: (pointing on a sign board that says) 
"Do not leave your valuable things unattended."
--------------
TO THE TUNE OF 'CALL ME MAYBE'

"Hey I just served you, Chicken na Crispy, Here's your order, Sabaw mo Gravy" - KFC Crew

"Hey I just met you And this is crazy But let's go woohoo And try for baby." - SIMS
--------------

RENATO CORONA , SEN. ENRILE & SEN. DRILON SINGING 'CALL ME MAYBE'
- By Facebuko

Renato Corona:
Am I that really unwell?
Don’t ask me, I’ll never tell
My blood sugar, it just fell
I’m not getting away

Renato Corona:
I waive my soul for a wish
1-8-9 men that I pissed
They should be signing for this
They’re not getting away

Excuse me, I’m goin’
You can’t keep me holdin’
JPE was shoutin’

Juan Ponce Enrile:
Where you think you’re going, baby?

Renato Corona:
Hey I just heard you
And this is crazy
Back with my wheelchair
Familiar, maybe?

It’s hard to look my
SAL-N baby
But here’s my waiver
Acquit me maybe

Hey I will dare you
And this is crazy
But here’s my waiver
Acquit me maybe

And all the pro-PNoys
Try to chase me,
But here’s my waiver
Acquit me maybe

Renato Corona:
I live simple life I call
We have no aircon at all
I keep my dollars to roll
Won’t be declared anyway

Basa’s and us had a deal
My daughter took the wheel
I don’t know what they would feel,
But they love us any way

Excuse me, I’m goin’
You can’t keep me holdin’
JPE was shoutin’

Juan Ponce Enrile:
Where you think you’re going, baby?

Renato Corona:
Hey I just heard you
And this is crazy
Back with my wheelchair
Familiar, maybe?

It’s hard to look my
SAL-N baby
But here’s my waiver
Acquit me maybe

Hey I will dare you
And this is crazy
But here’s my waiver
Acquit me maybe

And all the pro-PNoys
Try to chase me,
But here’s my waiver
Acquit me maybe

Franklin Drilon:
Before you came into my life
I missed you so bad
I missed you so bad
I missed you so, so bad

Before you came into my life
I missed you so bad
And you should know that
I missed you so, so bad

Renato Corona:
It’s hard to look my
SAL-N baby
But here’s my waiver
Acquit me maybe

Hey I will dare you
And this is crazy
But here’s my waiver
Acquit me maybe

And all the pro-PNoys
Try to chase me,
But here’s my waiver
Acquit me maybe

Franklin Drilon:
Before you came into my life
I missed you so bad
I missed you so bad
I missed you so, so bad

Before you came into my life
I missed you so bad
And you should know that
Convict you, maybe?
------------

WANT MORE PINOY PICK-UP LINES ? -------> CLICK HERE



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